Tuesday, July 17, 2007

"CLASS" test

REFLECTING ON: Being obsessed with grades...writing to teacher that has urged us to stop nit-picking tests and start thinking about matters of substance.

"Dear P--,

I told myself that I wouldn’t buy into the grades and the nonsense and the madness….but I did. Damn it. I’m all in and all about learning what I need to know in order to do this job. If I do this, I will learn what is important, which may or may not be included on the class test. But, if I am to pass the CLASS test, the real definition of class, I will realize that my sincere effort and desire to be competent can’t be graded so the grades shouldn't matter as much.

I'm trying to get this new learning curve-ball that's being thrown at me. Let me explain.

I'm trying to get the actual lesson here. I've had a fair number of "teachers" in my life, at least in name, but very few mentors. I think that's what you are trying to say here: chill out and get the real knowledge of what it means to be a good nurse. Not a wanna-be doctor, not a heal thyself case, and not an academic: a nurse. Working on it.

I gotta realize that this process is a harsh reprogramming of my mind. Having forced myself to stay academically competitive all my life (I mean, I got in to UCSF, right?) has put me at a mental disadvantage sometimes when looking for the "real" lesson. Clearly, many of us, especially me, need to be challenged to get past the nit-picky details of what we have memorized to get 4.0s, 90%ile GREs and find true, substantive, practical knowledge (wisdom?).

We'll get it--just in different ways.

I personally need to have some yell, "Hey buddy, what are you doing?" every once in a while to be reminded of what I'm actually trying to do here (something I'm still not sure I even know). Keep in my ear and maybe I'll just get it. I personally look forward to you yelling "Let's get it started" every morning.

Take care,


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